when asked, most people will claim that they hated high school and would never go back for a million bucks. then those same people get on facebook and find every single person they went to hs with (whether they actually knew them or not, apparently) and friend request them and tell them how great they look and how everyone should get together.
i prefer shame whip - when you cream the butter and sugar together… and then eat with a spoon. throw in a little peanut butter or maybe cream cheese and you’ll want to dive into the unhealthy mess…
- one stick of butter, refrigerated
- wax paper
- pour half a cup of sugar on wax paper. remove stick of butter from packaging and roll around on wax paper until butter stick is completely covered in sugar.
- eat. enjoy.
*for low calorie alternative, can be substituted with splenda
in order to get anything done, I need to have something that is an even bigger priority looming over me, so that I can shelve the huge priority in favor of the lesser priority.
glad i’m not the only one…
I’ve spent years claiming to be a taxidermist. Even went so far as to do a little research on it so that i could sound legit.
I’ve discovered I really hate talking about my job. I work at a small company, and wind up doing at-times-barely-connected-in-any-way bunch of stuff for them, have no specific job title (the better for them to underpay me with.)
I’m happy to have a job that doesn’t require shitty hours, has insurance (as questionable in quality as it may be) and does give me a paid gym membership so the hours of sitting on my ass can be counteracted.
But I would be gone in a nano-second if I got a better offer, and I really, really, really hate talking about it.
So I need a good lie. I want to go with Robert Downey Jr.’s line from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang:
“So, what do you do?”
“Me? I’m retired; when I was a kid, I invented dice.”
But who’d get the joke? And would people then assume I’m rich and leave me with the tab?
Suggestions? Comments? Flames? Etc.?
worse is when you send an email and sign it and then the person address it to you with your name spelled incorrectly!!!
It really annoys me when I send someone an email and sign it “Kat” and they respond and address me as “Kathleen.” I always look at how an email is signed and address the person accordingly.
today it was banana in my oatmeal… when i was younger i used to give up things for Lent - first cause my parents told me that i should, then because i learned to use it as a diet tool, then because i was oddly peer-pressured into it by coworkers… but for the past number of years, every time lent comes around, i say that i’m giving up meat… and then people remind me that i never eat meat. and my response is ‘see, i sacrifice every day. cause god knows i’d love to eat a big pile of bacon… but i dont. its like every day is lent for me…’ and they get annoyed and walk away which amuses me greatly. but this year, i’m going to try a little reverse-lent*… in the form of fruit. i simply do not eat much of it, so this year, i’m going to strive for a piece of fruit every day… we’ll see how it goes… thankfully the god i believe in is very forgiving ;) *i’ve tried this before. do you have any idea how much harder it is to remember to do something each day than it is to remember to NOT do something each day???
why is it that people cant just simply do their jobs?
i’ve had fights with one of the elevator guys in my building multiple times in the 2+ years that i’ve lived here, whereas i’ve never had a fight with any of the other elevator guys… which means its him, not me.
please remind me of this before xmas tips come around again next year…